Saturday, July 7, 2012

No Big Deal or Creepy?

I've recently been going through an interesting situation.  About a month ago, someone from my past contacted me through my Etsy shop

At first, I replied back with a "hi, how are you, and btw however did you find me here?"

After I hit send, I got a bad feeling.  I started wondering why an acquaintance from 20+ years ago would have my maiden name and associate it with my shop.

Here's the background info:
A long time ago, 1989 to be exact, I was on my first job out of college.  I was new, as was someone else in the office.  Naturally we struck up a friendship.  She was married at the time to the guy who contacted me.  We hung out occasionally, even after I moved to another city.  Right before I moved out of state, the woman told me she was divorcing her husband, and that was the last contact I had with either of them.

Until last month.

He contacted me with my maiden name.  He said he wanted me to call or e-mail him so I could tell him what I'm doing now. 

Um... I think that's clear that if you find my shop, you'll find this blog and you can see what I'm up to.  But that's just how I think, I guess.

I decided to ignore his convo, thinking he would get the hint.  He never replied how he found me, btw.  But every week I would get another convo saying "are you ok?" or "has anything happened to you?"  One line convos - every week.  Very creepy.  Still no reply on how he found me. 

I took to the Etsy forums with the question of how to handle this, and the consensus was that before I reported him to Etsy, I had to reply asking him to cease communications.  Next time he sent me a convo, I did reply.

I told him he was making me very uncomfortable and to please cease communications.  I then reported him to Etsy. 

He replied back - he stated how he found me.  He also came up with some story about how I was supposed to introduce him to my parents at dinner one night, and he waited 2 hours in the snow.  WTF?  Wishful thinking on his part?  Mistaken identity?  That really creeped me out..

He did say he would quit contacting me however, BUT

Etsy contacted him.  Told him to leave me alone.

I got another convo.  It came across as very angry, and this time he told a DIFFERENT story of how he found me.  He didn't understand how I wasn't welcoming his overtures.  He also claimed he was shutting down his account, but it's still there.  I will be reporting his latest convo - even though he told me not to - so his account should be shut down.

Now you know the story.   Isn't it weird?  I had people on the forums saying it was no big deal or whatever, but it wasn't really a friend getting back in touch after many years. He also mentioned he'd been looking for me for years. 

So bizarre - I had even forgotten his existence!  I guess I'm a memorable person.. lol.. except it's not a laughing matter.  I consider it stalking, and it's not a good feeling.  My husband thinks the situation is strange, and I have a son to protect as well.

 It has left me with a general feeling of ick.  I'm taking some time off from my shop, and will be spending time with family and friends for a couple of weeks til I can shake this feeling.  My shop will remain open, but I will just glance at it once a day and I will not ship anything til later this month.   Thanks for your understanding.. :)

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